This has been a long time coming.

I remember the days when I was bored in school and I had just downloaded the Tetris app developed by EA on my old Sony Xperia. Those were the days… I played that shit for days on end, and it’s really where my love for Tetris began.

Before Tetris, I remember a cute little block stacking game called Trioncube on the DS. I remember it being so simple yet so satisfying you couldn’t put it down. It’s what actually fueled my desire to slam blocks down fast and efficiently so my numbers would go up.

…And that’s all Tetris really is at the end of the day. It’s a game of “make the number go big”. Tetris 99 came out of absolutely nowhere for Nintendo Switch users and at first, we laughed… Oh, we laughed alright. “A Tetris battle royale? Fuck off will ya!” – That was before anyone knew how goddamn fun it’d be.

Shit man, I’d even go as far as to say it’s one of the best battle royale games on the market period. It’s the most unique one I’ve seen at least, and it’s just fucking Tetris. How can you strike gold and have lighting hit the same place twice on one goddamn handheld?!

This isn’t a review of Tetris 99, but more of a recommendation. If you have a Switch and a subscription to its online service, then stop playing that stupid NES collection and start playing some 99 homie.

It’s one of the most technical Tetris games I’ve played in a while; you have so many options in a fucking Tetris game and so many strategies for baiting players and taking them out… And at the end of the day, all you’re doing is stacking blocks!

If you ever watch a streamer or anyone who can play Tetris at a professional level, you hear them use terminology found in the more standard battle royale shooters like loadouts and baiting and all that jazz. It’s amazing to see.

You even get events every once in a while to get an exclusive theme that has some pretty sick music on it, and as of the recent Nintendo Direct, we got a lot more stuff to do… If you paid for the DLC, which of course I did.

The game is free you guys, if I can get that much value out of a free game then why not get a little more with some cash money it’s way. It deserves the payment at this point, and not like how people would justify Fortnite’s payments…

With the new update as well, y’all got challenges, a currency kinda thing that lets you buy themes and you have local multiplayer now; halle-fucking-lujah. I mean hey, it’s all just Tetris at the end of the day… But if you don’t like Tetris and you aren’t playing Tetris 99, then what are you even doing with your life? Go away, shoo, scram.

Now excuse me as I go into my cave with my Switch in hand, so many other games to play, yet Tetris is what I’m loyal to…

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